I am more than the clothes that I choose to put on. Guys can literally be thinking dirty thoughts about a girl no matter what she is wearing. Christians have blamed the women. They embarrass them because of the clothes that they have no problem wearing. They judge them constantly because of the clothes they wear and, if they think it’s not modest, the judgment becomes deeper than the clothes she is wearing. And that’s not right.
Why is it such a big deal? The message that Christians are telling the young girls who are growing up and trying to figure out who they are is that they are wrong for trying to express who they are through the way they dress. They are wrong for being women. They are wrong for being beautiful. They are wrong for feeling beautiful, because God-forbid if you ever know you look pretty, you’re probably going to hell because God only cares about the heart! They are not allowed to discover for themselves who they are, because, yes, clothing does impact your sense of self-worth.
Aren’t there more important things to worry about rather than condemning women for being beautiful as God intended them to be? Are there clothing items that, as Christians, we should not wear? Yes, I’m sure there are. But here’s the thing: That’s between them and God. It’s not your fight. It’s not your job to judge them. It’s your job to love them. See them as sisters in Christ and freaking love them for who they are. Because once you start making it a huge, daily struggle, you can’t stop judging women no matter where you are. You start noticing every little detail and that is all you think about! You forget that they are children of God who we are called to love and you start seeing them as objects. Clothing that you have deemed as inappropriate or immodest. You no longer see them as God sees them: His children, His beloved, beautiful, redeemed, worthy, loved, etc…
Should clothing really be that big of deal in the grand scheme of things? Is it really all that important? I think not. Yes, we should be thinking about whether or not something we wear could become a stumbling block for someone, but we cannot please everyone. Nor should we try. Our ultimate responsibility is to please GOD. If we have no conviction about what we’re wearing is inappropriate and immodest, I do not think it is wrong. Possibly it is better to not wear a certain article of clothing around someone if they think it is inappropriate in order to not make them stumble. But as long as you can go to God and find nothing wrong with it, it is okay.
We need to start telling the women that they are freaking beautiful. It is good to look like a woman and dress in style. It is good to look feminine. They are worth more than the disapproving glares because of the clothes that they put on that morning. They are worth more than their clothes. What we have done in making it such a huge deal is that that is all that they can think about. They are constantly worried about what other people are thinking about what they are wearing. Are they disappointed? Do they disapprove? This has completely stripped women of the tiny bit of confidence that they had left. And I do not believe that that is the way that God has intended for women to live.