My beautiful Daughter (Yes, I did call you beautiful!),
I have watched you struggle this past year. A lot. I wanted to step in so many times and stop the waves that kept crashing down around you. But I couldn’t do that because I knew that you would learn so much more standing among the beautiful, strong waves than if I had lifted you up into my arms to protect you. But here is what you forgot:
I was right there beside you the whole way!
Every wave. I felt with you. Every tear. I cried twice as hard. Every gust of wind that knocked the wind out of you or knocked you over. I was there, reaching out for your hand.
But you lost faith. You lost the ability to see me, feel me, hear me. But I was there. You wanted to give up. There were times when you did give up! But I wouldn’t let you. I placed people in your life to make sure that you didn’t give up. I placed people in your life at just the right time to remind you who you really are and who you should be.
I see your heart. It wants to be beautiful. It wants to shine and be joyful and happy and love others. I know that more than anybody else. But I also see what is holding you back. There are things that are standing in your way, Dear Child, and you can’t enter into full lifewith those things tearing at your soul.
Your chains have made you feel safe. They have protected you from the unknown. They have protected you from being vulnerable and open. You felt safe. You’ve been there before; it was your default.
Beautiful Daughter, it’s time to let go of those chains that have gripped so tightly to your heart that you are trying to hold onto them. It’s time to let go of those chains that have made you feel like you are in a safe place, even if it’s one rung at a time.
There were so many times when you lost hope this year. A relationship you really thought you wanted fell apart, making you doubt anybody would ever want you. Making you doubt your worth. How beautiful you are. Other relationship problems were brought into the light…problems that you have stuffed down for years. Depression. The unknown. Bad grades. The list continues. You felt as though your life was thrown into complete chaos.
And you forgot I was there. You forgot I was the only hope you have ever had and I am the only hope you will ever need! You forgot how to dream so big that people think you’re crazy. You settled for ‘making it through the day’. I have so many more wonderful plans for you!
Your heart has scars that need time to heal. You have tears that still need to fall. Your mind needs time to wrap around what has happened to you the past several months. You time to think about why you have changed so much and who you really are and who you want to be. Remember, you have the power to change!
The point is, it will take time. It will be a struggle and a times you will question whether it’s worth it and if I am still by your side. Never give up. Keep going, because that path is exactly where I want you to be. Walking uphill, maybe. But it’s a path certain to end up in amazing places. I promise to be by your side the whole way. I will be there to talk to. Always. I will be there to wipe away your tears. I will be there to extend grace to your trembling legs as you making one small step in the right direction. Grace. It will cover all.
My Daughter, I love you. Yes, read that again…I love you! You are so beautiful and I have the most amazing plans for your life. The struggle is real. But change is inevitable. You got this! I believe in you.